When the inner journey starts, everything is clear because the mind is the master, and the mind has all the guidelines, it knows it all.
It has read all these books, listened to all these spiritual teachings, created all these beautiful stories about what will happen when enlightenment (or ‘this’, or ‘that’) is finally reached.
But as you wake up, old guidelines fade away. Old certainties are questioned and confusion appears. The old master is leaving but the new master has not yet appeared.
Don’t seek the old. Old certainties were an illusion.
Certainties are generated within the mind so it can work properly but existence itself is completely at ease with uncertainties. It is made of uncertainties, of wonders, of mysteries. Everything is moving. Nothing can be grasped. That which you can grasp is that which is dead, lifeless, outdated. Confusion is simply a result of being on the same wavelength as the mind, of being identified with it.
Therefore, accept confusion, welcome it, float with it and see that it contains the seeds of faith (and more).
If acceptance doesn’t arise naturally, ask yourself the following questions:
What is it that is perceiving confusion? Can confusion be perceived from a place of confusion?
If you contemplate it deeply enough, you will see that there is a vast difference (but a very subtle dividing line) between believing you are confused and being clear that you are confused.
If you are clear about your confusion, you recognize that this confusion appears in the vast space, the vast emptiness within that is ever clear and that it is only an appearance among many, only a thought that has maybe a little more momentum, a little more intensity than other thoughts.
Hence, with that understanding, you can replace “I am confused” with “I am clear that I am confused”
Remain with it until it teaches you all it needs to teach you.